The Super Mario Bros. Movie

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⭐ 5.0/10

(Originally written by Tim)

I hesitate to fall back on "this movie wasn't made for me", but who was it made for then? I played Mario as a kid, do kids today even know who Mario is? Anyways, I didn't actively hate this movie it was just really boring. I do think there is a lot of potential, and I think the parts where it took inspiration from Mario levels and gameplay were the most fun. Does Mario need a real life family? I get that the plot in Mario games in non-existent, but this felt pretty flat to me as well.

My major criticism is that Mario has a million incredible songs to use and they stuff this with real life popular songs instead. Are they playing Beastie Boys for me? Do kids get a laugh hearing Thunderstruck? Seriously the best part of the movie was hearing all my favourite songs in the credits, just play the hits in the movie!

Speaking of playing the hits, its nice to see Peach's castle, but lets explore some worlds from the games! For example, why is Donkey Kong's world where Mario Kart is introduced? Let's see some of the unique DK stuff! It feels like I am asking for fan service, but what I want is for them to take the glorious creativity of the games and make a movie out of it. Is that so hard?

Another annoyance is the injustice it does to Galaxy. Is a suicidal Luma funny? Do kids think it is funny? Felt like Aubrey Plaza was in the writer's room or something.

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