God of War Ragnarok

⭐ 9.0/10

(Originally written by Joseph)

Let me tell ya, this game has had a hold on me since the new year. I have transformed into Kratos, always trying to lift things around the house and yelling while I do it (and also signing God of War, may your hammer be mighty). The thing this game gets so right is that it is immensely satisfying to be in control of a Greek god for fifty hours. It somehow feels good every time you lift a giant boulder or pull a tree out of the ground. I don't know what kind of alchemy was performed on this game to make Kratos feel so tangible, but if it's simply controller vibrations and camera work, kudos to them.

The first God of War game in this series came out in 2018 and was praised for its narrative and gameplay. I really liked that game, but to get the negative out of the way in this review, I'll just say the narrative didn't work for me then, and totally does not work for me now. To be certain, the acting performances are great, especially with Kratos (he won best performance), and the cinematography and action sequences are some of the best in video games. I might even say this is a bad story told well. I just couldn't really get myself to care about what was going on.

It had a lot of opportunities to do something interesting with the story. There are a million moments where it seems like true conflict will emerge, where there are hints of moral ambiguity on both sides. But in the end they just... Don't do that. The good guys all become good, the bad guys are revealed to be just bad... It was pretty deflating. But a million people say they cried in this game so don't take my word. For me, after 50 hours there were no tears from me but plenty of eye rolls as every character needed their cheesy Stranger Things moment, every character having their arc by simply... talking.

Anyways, who cares about the story! You get to kill things!! Plus still game is probably divided up 40/60 with story to side content. The combat is so, so great. It is so crunchy, and you get that beautiful power fantasy of parrying a dragon's headbutt with your shield. What is cooler than that! Every cinematic finisher is amazing and brutally violent and I had stars in my eyes seeing the man I control crack the neck of a magical bull. You get 3 weapons in this game, but still all I wanted to use was my axe which is as iconic as Thor's hammer (and has similar qualities).

Speaking of Thor, there are some great fights here. Thor is massive, so fighting him looked amazing as the short king Kratos is tossing him around. After beating games like Elden Ring, I found the combat to be quite a bit breezier, which again contributed to the power fantasy of destroying these Norse gods on my first try. Then after the game there are some truly challenging side-bosses, one of which took me 2 hours to beat and was one of my favorite gaming moments.

So yeah, great game. I really wish I connected with this story, because it had potential to be on my Mount Rushmore. I just can't give a higher score to a game that had me scrolling my phone during cutscenes. But holy crap, I will never tire of the feeling of timing the perfect parry, or chopping with a fully-charged heavy attack, or pulling an enemy to me with my chains, or catching my axe mid-swing, or...

Thanks to Beans for this kingly Christmas gift.